Basil Simon – musical life coach
Making new friends is not as difficult as you might think! It only takes 2 careful steps!
Meet new people.
Only when you put yourself into new situations will you meet new people. Then, and only then, will you stand the chance of making new friends.
Just have the confidence and faith that stepping out into brand new situations will deliver results!
A few good ways you could meet new people…..
- Enroll in an interesting course at your local college. Nothing too heavy, maybe a cookery class? Or an art class? or whatever takes your fancy!
- Maybe try a night school class? try learning a new language?
- Do some voluntary work at your local political party constituencies office. They will always welcome help and you will definitely meet new talkative people there!
- Try joining a local sports center. Go and do a sport? like badminton or table tennis maybe?
- If you have a dog then join a dog walking club, or walk the dog in places where you meet other pet lovers to chat to. Just compliment them on a lovely dog… away you go!
- Volunteer to help out at your local community center? Or a local care home?
- Join a chess club! Even if you cannot play, there will be plenty of people willing to help you out!
Try getting all the info online from your local education authority about free courses.
You will definitely bump into new and interesting people in classes plus you get to learn! Fun!. In all the above situations, you will gain the opportunity to meet new people and make new friends. Network network network!
Once you have access to new people you need to correctly manage those new connections in order to maximise the chance of gaining new friends. We need them to suspect you would make a great new friend! How do we do this? We need to provide value!
People will only value other people if….
- They devote time and full attention in conversations.
- They listen and respond positively and appropriately to what is being said
- They maintain regular quality contact
- They show a genuine interest in their life
- They become useful in situations
- They go out of their way to help in times of need
- They provide a mood of fun
- They deliver good councell and emotional support
- They demonstrate honesty and trustworthiness
- They provide solutions to problems
- They avoid being negative about other people privately
- They make people feel positive by celebrating the good in life and celebrating the good things they see in others. They make you feel good about yourself
- They accept people despite race, religion or ideology.
By presenting yourself as per the above pointer list then nice people will notice you and respond in kind! In order to gain nice people in our lives we must be nice ourselves! We do not judge others, we simply look for the good in them, celebrate the good things we find and advertise ourselves as easy going friend worthy people!
Here is a song I produced and wrote that warns about the lines that divide us in life. Borders, beliefs, politics….
Note: If Somebody seems to want to be your friend then it is important that you monitor their quality of human interaction in order to work out if they will qualify. You can use the above checklist to work out if they will likely make a good friend to you or not. In the beginning of a new situation people can present themselves in strange ways because they may be insecure about themselves. This doesnt mean they will make a bad friend, it just means you may have to take a little time to make a full decision about them.
Making good friends works both ways. Be careful who you let into your life.
Have you ever made a mistake letting the wrong people into your life?
If so what happened? Leave a reply below! (after you use the share box?)